How To Go From Who You Are, To Who You Want To Be

There is a point in people’s lives where the pain of staying the same is worse than the pain of change. It is at this point, and only at this point, they are able to grow.

There is a reason so many people have tried, and failed, to change the people around them. Myself included. You cannot change someone if they do not yet want to change themselves.

Excuses are easy and come in abundance.

However, there is a moment, when someone decides that they are going to set out to become the person they’ve always known they could be and left with only one question, what now?

This article aims to answer that question, it will describe how you can go from who you are, to who you want to be.

Step One — Responsibility

Once you have decided to change, you need to figure out how change can occur, and the only way to get answers is through taking responsibility.

As I have said, excuses are readily available and come in abundance, therefore, you need to rid yourself of them all. You need to own up to who you are and where you are and come to the painful realisation that you are fully responsible for both.

Being fully responsible doesn’t mean blaming yourself, it takes the blame away completely because it doesn’t matter who or what is at fault, the only thing that matters now is who is capable of changing them, and the answer is only you, meaning the responsibility is only yours to bare.

As painful as it is, this is the only way forward, power follows where the finger points, so if you’re blaming other people/things for where you are then you’re signing the death certificate of your future self.

Once you have taken responsibility, you’re able to start identifying parts of yourself and your circumstances that need to be changed, which leads us to the next step.

Step Two — Action

Once you have stopped waiting for the universe to fix what it has apparently broken, and realised that you are the only person capable of changing yourself, it is time to take action.

Nothing changes if nothing changes, meaning after identifying what needs to change, the only left is for you to take the required action to change it.

Write down the things you do not like about yourself or your circumstances. Then, write down how they can be changed, and then write down what you’re going to do to change them.

Now, go do that.

The only difference between you and the person you’ve always wanted to be is the necessary action it takes to become the latter, so figure out what that action is and just start doing it.

Step Three — Discipline

Taking responsibility and taking the required action necessary to become your future self is pointless if you’re unable to do so for long enough to actually get there.

This is where discipline comes in. Becoming a better version of yourself is not easy, it requires grit, determination, willpower and patience, but I believe all of these fall under the umbrella of discipline.

There will come in time is a journey such as this when you will no longer feel motivated enough to continue, the excitement has worn off and you’re faced with the harsh reality and realisation of how long this is going to take.

To keep going, you’re going to need to have enough self-discipline to do so.

So, when starting, it’s important that you simultaneously start building your discipline.

Motivation is fickle, it will let you down when you need it the most, but discipline is reliable and will be with you forever, given that you continue to keep yourself disciplined.

If you start to stop doing things because they are uncomfortable then it may be a warning sign that your discipline is dying, if this happens, choose the next uncomfortable thing and go again.

Make sure that you remain disciplined at all costs because, without it, you’re increasing the chances that the difficulty of becoming who you’ve always wanted to be will be enough to stop you from ever getting there.

It’s a simple article, but changing is simple, it just isn’t easy. Reading this was the easy part, nothing that follows will follow suit.

Now, wake up and realise who truly holds the power behind changing and identify which parts of yourself need it, then take the action that will do so, and make sure you can do it long enough. Good luck.